The disappearing pound coin.

[Robb]

3 nuns go into a hardware shop (dont ask why they are nuns etc it dont matter) and purchase a fan heater served by a young assistant. The fan costs £15 (£5 each) and just after they leave the manager comes up and says to the assistant 'you just sell that fan heater to those nuns?'. The assistant replies 'yes', the manager quickly snaps 'that was on offer last week for £10, go take £5 out the till and give it back to them, i cant charge them full whack after the offer (must have been catholic


Anyway the assistant is just about to catch up with the nuns and thinks 'i can make i crafty couple o quid ere' so he pockets £2 and gives each nun £1 back each, therefore each nun has paid only £4 each. If 3 x £4 is £12 and £2 is in the assistant's pocket, where has the remaining £1 gone!

 

[Ed]

Oh no not another mind game thread... its easy btw haha.

 

[ollyc98]

Heard this one before lol.

 

[joesouthgate]

I don't get it fwn

 

[Antony]

miiiinnnndddd beeeennnnnd!!!!!

 

[ollyc98]

Look at it a different way, the shop has £10, the assistant has 2 and the nuns have 1 each.

The nuns have actually paid £3.33.3333333333333333 each (10/3)

Meh maths was never my strong point

 

[jim_bling]

man walks past a shop see`s a nice shirt for £25 so he goes up to his friend and asks ifhe can lend £25 his friend says i cant i can lend you £12.50 he says ok then goes on his way and bumps into another friend and ask`s him if he can lend £12.50 so he can buy this shirt for goin out tonight with them he says sure so £12.50 + £12.50 is £25 so the man goes to the shop and gets the shirt for £20 he is chuffed with it goes home to get ready to meet the lads puts £3 in his top pocket for a pint and goes to the pub meets the lads and tell them that he got the shirt for £20 and that he is keepin £3 for a pint and that they can have £1 back so take £1 off £12.50 is £11.50 times that by two is 23 pound but what about the £3 he has in his top pocket it adds to £26 but he only started with £25 so where did the extra pound come from

god that was long lol

 

[Craig]

A man and his son are out walking when the son is hit by a car, they rush him to hosiptal and in A&E they are assigned a Doctor, however, when the doctor arrives, they say:

"I can't treat this paitent, he is my son."

How does that work?

 

[jackassuk]

the boys dad is the doctor

 

[Rob..]

his dad said it, not the doctor... 'they say:'

 

[Alienfish360]

it's a female doctor, and the doctor is the boy's mother

 

[ollyc98]

The doctor is a woman, shows our sexist society

Damn it you beat me to it

 

[jacb_1978]

A man is pushing his car across London. He eventually arrives outside a hotel in Park Lane and there discovers he has become bankrupt. How has this happened?

 

[sonic]

monopoly

 

[Craig]

What gets wetter the more it dries?

 

[ollyc98]

A towel

What gets bigger the more you remove?

 

[jacb_1978]

A hole

Before Mount Everest was discovered, what was the tallest mountain on Earth?

 

[ollyc98]

Mount everest it just wasnt discovered

 

[Robb]

What do you break when you say its name?

 

[ollyc98]

Silence

If a tree falls in the woods and no-one is around to hear it does anyone care?

 

[jacb_1978]

lol

How can you throw a ball as hard as you can and have it come back to you, even if it doesn't hit anything, there is nothing attached to it, and no one else catches or throws it?

 

[Corbs]

hahaha great thread!

A mosquito is flying west at 5 mph. A truck hits in in the opposite direction at 50mph and SPLAT! Mosquito on the windscreen. Since the mosquito had to reverse direction and travel through 0mph, did the truck also stop for a split second?

 

[Robb]

lol

How can you throw a ball as hard as you can and have it come back to you, even if it doesn't hit anything, there is nothing attached to it, and no one else catches or throws it?

Throw it vertically



And no the truck doesnt stop.

 

[Corbs]

A man is found dead in a phonebox. His wrists have been cut and the phone is off the hook. There is smashed glass everywhere. How did he die?

 

[Craig]

A man is found dead in a phonebox. His wrists have been cut and the phone is off the hook. There is smashed glass everywhere. How did he die?

Crab people.

 

[ollyc98]

I should think from the evidence given: oxygen starvation due to lack of blood

 

[R05_Micra]

A man is found dead in a phonebox. His wrists have been cut and the phone is off the hook. There is smashed glass everywhere. How did he die?

he was on the phone, telling his mate about the fish he caught and smashed his hand thru the glass when he said "this big!" thus cutting his wrists!

he was on the phone, telling his mate about the fish he caught and smashed his hand thru the glass when he said "this big!" thus cutting his wrists!

billy is found dead in a pool of water with broken glass, how did billy die?

 

[jacb_1978]

billy is a fish

Quick Draw McLockwood rode into town on Thursday. He checked into the saloon and booked a room. He stayed for 2 nights and left on that Wednesday. Explain!

 

[kristian]

A man is found dead, in a field

.. hanging from a noose

..hung from an unclimbable tree.. 15ft in the air...

how did he kill himself?

( and HE did kill himself, there is no climbing equipment lying around or underneath him.. step ladders etc.. )

( its a bit crap this one, but only one I can think off )

 

[ollyc98]

My guess is that he is 14 feet tall which, with a short noose would leave him just enough room to hang himself.

Why are all these recent ones about death?

I've got one, A guy lives in a locked room, no way in or out, no windows. He has no chickens yet manages to have an egg every morning, how is this so? (well that was lame but all the good ones are gone )

 

[Craig]

billy is a fish

Quick Draw McLockwood rode into town on Thursday. He checked into the saloon and booked a room. He stayed for 2 nights and left on that Wednesday. Explain!

Thursday is the name of the horse.

A man is found dead, in a field

.. hanging from a noose

..hung from an unclimbable tree.. 15ft in the air...

how did he kill himself?

( and HE did kill himself, there is no climbing equipment lying around or underneath him.. step ladders etc.. )

( its a bit crap this one, but only one I can think off )

He hung himself and the tree grew?

 

[jacb_1978]

thats right craig at least someone bothered to answer it fwn

 

[Robb]

Why was John always late for work?

 

[ollyc98]

My guess is his watch was broken....

 

[hughes_16v]

A man lives in a block of flats and lives on the 20th floor. Most days he goes to the 5th floor in the lift and walks the rest of the 15 flights of stairs. But can come to the bottom floor from the top no problems.

The only time he can go in the lift to the 20th floor is when its raining or there is another person in the lift, Why is this?

 

[ollyc98]

He is really short and can't reach higher than 5

 

[pixieness]

OH MY GOD!!!! Answer all the unanswered ones! I can't live with not knowing the answers! This is killing me!!!


...and will also make an excellent Starter Task for the kids tomorrow morning :grinning: