Proud to be british!

R05_Micra

Ex. Club Member
Being British...

Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish
kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on
a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of anything foreign.

Oh and......

Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.

Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to
the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can
buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and
a DIET coke.

Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to
the counters.

Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the
drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then
have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to
talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a
skating rink.

NOT TO MENTION...

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.

British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.

101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of Control Scalextric cars.

and finally.........

In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.

I am proud to be British

RULE BRITANNIA


i thought it was mint lol! :D
 
Haha awesome!!!

Ive done the 9V battery thing, didnt know you could die from that! lol!! also,

Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and
a DIET coke.

I do that!! LOL. Gotta get some 'good' inside you after ordering all that crap!!
 
i like the first bit lol!

"Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish
kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on
a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of anything foreign."


so true its unreall lol!
 
Arnold said:
I do that!! LOL. Gotta get some 'good' inside you after ordering all that crap!!
Diet cola still isn't very "good" for you anyway, it just has NeutraSweet instead of sugar lol

Good list there :D
 
I know, but compared to full fat which takes rusty bolts off cars, its the healthier alternative ;)
 
Arnold said:
I know, but compared to full fat which takes rusty bolts off cars, its the healthier alternative ;)

and cleans up dried blood on roads, and disolvs a tooth in a cup over night lol!
 
Arnold said:
Haha awesome!!!

Ive done the 9V battery thing, didnt know you could die from that! lol!! also,



I do that!! LOL. Gotta get some 'good' inside you after ordering all that crap!!


I do it cos I dont like full fat coke its horrible
 
LOL, some of those are funny fact's!!!! U certainly get some silly Brit's about lol!!!

And Arnold, the 9v battery thing is probably related to people with pacemakers!!!
 
Ems said:
And Arnold, the 9v battery thing is probably related to people with pacemakers!!!

No, the PP9 battery although small has a high enough current when discharged suddenly (like earthing it across your toungue) to disrupt the electrical activity of the brain.
 
sonic said:
No, the PP9 battery although small has a high enough current when discharged suddenly (like earthing it across your toungue) to disrupt the electrical activity of the brain.

You can also make fire with a PP9 if you have a flexible AA battery tester :) Found that out by accident!
 
Ems said:
And Arnold, the 9v battery thing is probably related to people with pacemakers!!!

It's the smallest voltage know to have killed someone. It you catch it on the wrong part of your heartbeat you're a gonna. A MILLISECOND either way! I had to watch a horrible presentation as part of my uni degree health safety section. I studied Electrical and Electronic engineering. The pictures were horrible. Please having there chest cut open just so they cut breathe, cos it makes your blood literally boil. Errrrggghh! lol
 
Arnold said:
You can also make fire with a PP9 if you have a flexible AA battery tester :) Found that out by accident!

you can by rubbing two sticks together too :D:D
 
RIK said:
you can by rubbing two sticks together too :D:D

this is what the brits think they can do if they went camping.
but would give up on the 5th hour after blistered hands. and declare it a nasty foreign way to make a fire anyway.
 
Blimey didn't know that. The next member of my family to lick a battery get's a slap round the earhole lol!! :D
 
Ems said:
Blimey didn't know that. The next member of my family to lick a battery get's a slap round the earhole lol!! :D


"27 parent and child combo brits die each year from 9v battery-tongue-earhole slap punishment joint electrocution."
 
i held one by the rubber bit and got my brother to start the engine, thinking "if i hold the rubber it wont get me".. WRONG!
 
Alienfish360 said:
I gave myself a blast with a HT lead, testing for spark and my finger caught the screwdriver........ lets just leave it at it hurt.

you know... if any one else had said that... i would have been suprised
 
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